a month of loss

Late last night, after we were in bed, we heard laughter outside, followed by the sound of a car accelerating away from our house. We looked out front, figuring at first that we'd been TPed, but we hadn't (and we don't really have the trees to make that worthwhile anyway). As I stood at the front door and looked for evidence of anything, I finally realized that something was actually gone. Dear friends back in North Carolina had given us a simple, solid wooden bench as a housewarming present, and someone stole it last night! It seems pretty crazy since the bench is nearly ten years old, and sad, too. I loved that bench; it was a great place to sit while the kids played on their scooters out front.

As I looked back over the past month, I realized that it's just another loss in the list right now. A week ago Monday, I was frantically shopping for a new washing machine as our faithful servant had given up (actually, it was our second washer to die, but when our first one went two years ago, our awesome neighbor Martie just happened to be getting rid of his old one, so we got it). That loss was actually pretty expensive because washing machines aren't cheap, plus we decided that with as much laundry as I do, it made sense to get a front loader (get this: a top loading machine uses an average of 40-50 gallons of water PER LOAD of laundry; a front loader uses and average of 13-16! No wonder we have been using so much water as a family! Just amazing!). With the laundry piling up rapidly, I was in a hurry to replace it, so didn't have much time for price comparisons... thankfully it was President's Day weekend so everyone was running a bit of a sale. I freak out when I think about the cost of the machine but I am hopeful that we'll really start to see a difference in our water bill (and electricity, too, a little bit, because this thing is supposed to reduce the drying time needed because it spins like an airliner).

The first loss of the month was our patio table out back. We just had a really windy day and the wind took out the umbrella (yes, in retrospect we should have taken it down before the wind) and just shattered the table. Andy got it all cleaned up, but enough fell between the boards that he is swearing to never go under the deck again. So now we don't have a table to eat at outside, which is sad because this is the perfect time of year for it (down here, sorry Rabia). The table and the bench are pretty low priorities for replacements right now as we are entering a transitional employment period. Thankfully neither are critical to our health and well being, but we are sad to lose them all the same.

The table shattered and I just had to take some pictures.




Thankfully we have only lost minor things (well, except for the washer but hooray for Lowe's (sorry Josh, but we did try Home Depot first) next day delivery!). And if you can't laugh about things like this, well then you are pretty far gone. So we are just laughing instead.

DEFCON status

I decided that I needed to implement a system for gauging the urgency of issues/requests around our house. I was tired of dealing with every issue as a crisis requiring screaming and immediate intervention. Seriously, is it necessary to interrupt me while I'm in the middle of a phone call in order to tell me how you want to spend your Christmas money when we next go to Target? That's not exactly an emergency, in my mind. However, I can understand that there are times when excitement and urgency are natural. We just need a classification system to help define it. So here is our new household threat monitoring system in a nutshell:

• DEFCON 1: GET EXCITED, take injured party to the hospital, the house is on fire, etc. etc. screaming is understandable but still not OK. mortal peril. interrupting Mom is expected.
  
• DEFCON 2: get excited, someone is bleeding or about to fall off the roof--immediate assistance is required but no lives are in danger. screaming is not necessary, but exclamations are OK. interrupting Mom is acceptable.
  
• DEFCON 3: no need to get excited. help is needed, but not urgently. no one is injured and no one is in peril. buttons can wait 30 seconds and help will be given as needed. please remain calm and use statements or requests, no exclamations or commands. interrupting Mom is not acceptable.
  

Surprisingly, the children have taken to it pretty well. We did have a lengthy discussion one night, analyzing different situations and discussing what category they fell into. At first they thought Elanor's staples were a DEFCON 2, but I explained that an ER visit actually merited a DEFCON 1 status. They have already realized that most of their issues actually fall into DEFCON 3 and that they need to react accordingly. I've even been able to derail some hysterics simply by saying, "Wait, wait! Is this a 1, 2, or 3?" Not a lot has changed, but so far it has served to give them a moment to stop and really analyze what's going on and what needs to be done.

I'm telling you, give me a year to flesh this out and I'll have my book deal.

couches, etc.

Jen, they are leather. Ooh la la! Very dreamy. A splurge, yes, but I think it will be worth it! I put together a panorama (OK, Photoshop put it together) to show you what the setup looks like now. I realize Michael looks goofy here, but he wanted to be in the picture and PS shrank him. not sure why; maybe it's because he's at the edge of the picture? I think one of my favorite parts about the whole setup is my grandmother's paintings over the couches. They look just about perfect there, or else the couches look just about perfect as an accent for them.


In other news, Andy is safely home and we are all glad. I wish he could have been sitting with me in church on Sunday... communion in the Fellowship Hall during the contemporary service. Either because it's where it is, or because it's contemporary, or because it's more casual, instead of passing the elements around, we walk forward to receive them. We sat up front, so we went first, and I spent the rest of the time openly watching everyone who walked forward (I know, I probably should have been praying or reflecting or something, for which I apologize).

People, they just shone. Or was it my eyes? I felt like I was home, watching these familiar, yet strange and new faces coming forward. So many had grown (like a foot each or something) and they were all beautiful, I kid you not. A year changes so much, but I think there was more than that. I really felt that I was watching the body of Christ, that we were all participating in this crazy, unifying, ancient ritual, however little we understand it. It was amazing. I cannot describe it other than to tell you that I was awed.

oh boy oh boy oh boy oh boy

Our new couches were delivered today. (Shhh, don't tell Andy! We were going to pick them up ourselves but I decided that it was worth the delivery charge to not inflict that on either Andy or my dad, who arrives tomorrow.) Oh wow. That is about all I can say. We have never bought a new, nice couch before and it feels kind of extravagant. Of course, now I have no idea how to arrange the room--we actually got a couch and a loveseat and, for some reason, they need a significant amount of real estate. That is something I feel comfortable making the guys do--move everything around for me until I am satisfied!

Do you think I can spend the day doing nothing but sitting on them? We haven't had a couch since last summer and wow, do I miss it. Thanks to Karen and Debbie for talking me into the ones we picked!

two things

I had two happy moments this week and wanted to share them with you. Both were unexpected; both were thrilling in their own ways. One was hoped for, the other one was just a taste of grace.

1. hoped for: last Sunday, I cleared the table for breakfast, which meant putting away my laptop. I had been working on pictures from a shoot on Friday (ooh, doesn't that sound impressive) and saved a couple to my new, pretty, sleek Sony USB drive (I call it my geek stick) to transfer to the desktop for presentation. For clearing the table, I put the laptop in its case and the geek stick in my pocket. As I walked around, I thought to myself, I ought to put this up by the big computer for safekeeping and then promptly forgot all about it... until I put my hand in my pocket at lunchtime. The stick wasn't there. Maybe I did put it in a safe place. Don't remember doing it, but I have been known to do something and then forget that it's been done. I have lost my mind before. Maybe it is safe at home. We got home and I promptly started tearing the place apart. Anywhere I could reasonably have put it, I searched. No luck. Monday, after Michael and I did school, I packed up the kids and headed back to church. Looked in the bathroom (took the kids there after church). Had a secretary let me into the auditorium and scoured the floor in there. Left secretary with my phone number and a promise to call me if it turned up. Drove to the restaurant where we had lunch. Not there. Asked in Trader Joe's. Also not there. Started to feel very sad and depressed. Not that anything on there was irreplaceable--I had everything on one computer or the other anyway--but I had my photography on there, pictures of a family, and nothing to identify me. I let it go for the rest of the week (no, really!) and then started asking around again this morning at church. Once again, no luck... until I realized (sorry, during the service) that I was sitting in front of at least six guys busy working on computers (doing slides and sound mixing and who knows what else). Maybe, just maybe, someone picked it up and thought, Wow, this pretty thing looks like it belongs to a computer. Hey, there are computers right there! I might leave it where the computers go! So I timidly approached the Tech Guys and said, "I know you are not the Lost and Found, but you have computers and I lost a computer item and has anyone given you a USB drive?" The answer was yes! My little drive and I were reunited! Truly a bright spot in my week. And there is now a small text file on the drive with my name and phone number in case we are ever separated again.

2. taste of grace: We went to Manhattan Beach yesterday (think Fort Myers Beach but bigger and on a hill), which meant that we had to drive home on the 110, which ends in Pasadena. There is no straight way to get home from there, so I generally turn whenever it's convenient (this is thanks to Caroline, whose infant screaming in the car urged me to take the fastest way home, meaning whichever way had the green light). Yesterday, I turned on Del Mar and was greeted with unexpected beauty. There is about a mile long stretch (give or take) of street lined with huge jacarandas. I think that's what they are; if they're not, they sure look like them. The trees are in full bloom right now and the street is lined with this beautiful purple procession. It was so unexpected, so breathtaking, such a thing to give thanks for. If you are in the area, take a drive, or better yet, take a walk or a bike ride, along Del Mar. Better hurry because the blossoms are already falling. I wonder if my jacaranda sapling back home has blossomed this year.

Boxes are beginning to pile up.

more self revelation

The real truth of the matter does not actually lie in the fact that I am not a fun person. I guess I have to moderate that observation and say that I am not very fun. Mylissa should still come visit. Jenny should still come, too.

I have been pondering more and have concluded that possibly the main reason guests can be a stress for me is that I am not a good housekeeper. I accumulate clutter. I fight back. Sometimes quite successfully. Now is not one of those times. I am not consistent in cleaning (although the kitchen and the bathroom get the most attention, I promise you are never going to sit on a dirty toilet. Everything else may be dirty, but your food and your body will be clean.). Although I vacuum quite a lot nowadays and you can be thankful for that!

The other issue is that when one has company (let me transition into third person for a moment please), one does not care to waste valuable visiting time with frivolous matters such as cleaning or paying bills.

Which is why I have a significant backlog of both to address. So if you have been feeling guilty for your visit (past, pending, or future), feel guilt no more. The fault lies entirely with me.

ode to an appliance

I can't believe that I am so excited about an appliance that I want to blog about it. Actually, I can believe it, but I would have expected that the appliance about which I'd blog would be my KitchenAid mixer (!!) or the oven or something like that. Even a new (front loading) washing machine would be interesting enough to blog about, I think, but a vacuum cleaner? Surely not!

However, here I am, all excited to tell you about my new vacuum cleaner. Wow oh wow. We didn't bring out vacuum out here because there was simply no place to put it in the trailer. None. Seriously, no cubic inches were spared in the packing of the trailer (5'x8', thanks for asking) and the vacuum couldn't possibly make the cut. After all, we had to make sure there was room for my KitchenAid. Unfortunately, we arrived and discovered that we had nice off white apartment carpet instead of dingy brown or gray industrial dorm carpet. So a vacuum seemed like an important thing. Especially with three small children. Initially we thought we'd make do with a small, cheap, stick vacuum, with the option to borrow a neighbor's real vacuum once every few months. Bad idea. Honestly, we should have just gotten the real deal straight away. I think the carpet now needs some TLC after this experiment.

A kind relative sent us a check for a Christmas present and I put my foot down and told Andy it was time to give in and buy a real vacuum. I found a great deal on a bagless one online, ordered it, and received it a few days later. Enter the heavenly choir. Not only is this baby bagless, but it has three different filters, all of which are washable. Not: pull the filter out and knock it on the side of the trash can, choking on the dust wafting upward and digging chunks of dirt out of crevices. Instead: pull canister out, dump dust and dirt into the trash, then pull out filters from anywhere and rinse in the kitchen sink, wash with dish soap, dry, and reassemble vacuum. It is actually easy to take apart and put back together. Easy!

And does it ever pick up a ton of dirt. I don't even have the dog out here to add in her puppy fur. This delightful machine has a dirt sensor--red for dirt being actively sucked up, green for no more dirt (i.e., clean). Pasadena is a very very dusty place, which I knew because I had to take apart the computer six weeks ago to clean all kinds of dust out of it, but I shudder now that I know how much of that same dust had settled into my carpet. We have been breathing dust like mad! In the initial pass through the apartment, the new vacuum had to be emptied once (not a small canister either) and I had to wash out filter #1. Absolutely amazing. I am in love. I am just left brained enough to consider this a modern miracle.

Which is my favorite feature? The dirt sensor? The washable filters? The canister which is oh-so-each to empty? The motor which is about half as loud as the teeny little Dirt Devil it's replacing? I can't decide. But I am concerned that the fact that this may be almost my favorite Christmas present this year just goes to show that I really am a grownup now.

cleanliness

Here is a question for you: why is it that, at any given time in my life, I can only have one room in my house clean? I'm serious. For some reason, one room in my house can look like a Martha Stewart magazine spread (OK, never in this life, but it will be tidy and dusted, etc.), but every other room will look like a cyclone came through. If ever I am missing a child, I will just assume they have joined forces with Dorothy and are wrestling her for her silver slippers (yes, they are actually silver for those of you who never read the book).

Example: last week I was caught up on laundry. For all of one day. You wouldn't think that five people actually wore that many clothes, but they do. So laundry was all put away... but you couldn't see my desk upstairs. This week, my desk is like a pristine wilderness (or it was until Michael started cutting snowflakes and left his artwork on it), but I have a huge basket of laundry to fold in the kids' room. Plus my own clothes which need to washed today before they escape the laundry basket and take over my bedroom. That's just two rooms; I haven't even mentioned the bathrooms, which were clean last week (not the same day as the laundry was done), or the kitchen, which was spotless for about two hours until we decided to actually cook a meal in it. I won't even mention the playroom. Well, I'll mention it, but only to say that it is probably a lost cause, unless I can get ahead of it while we are taking our Christmas break from school.

Speaking of which, it's time for parent-teacher conferences around here, so as both the teacher and the parent, I will give you your Christmas update. Michael is doing extremely well in class this year. He consistently aces his spelling tests and really seems to understand how the phonograms work. His math is also excellent: he understands the concept behind multiplication quite well, but needs to practice so that the facts are at his fingertips. Same with addition and subtraction. He is adoring history and reading. Can't pull his nose out of a book, especially if it has anything at all to do with the ancient Greeks, the Trojan War, or Odysseus. He has almost finished his first grade study of animals and will be ready to move on to the human body in January. Did I miss anything? He needs to spend more time running around outside (those books again) and his teacher needs to get a better grip on arts and crafts so he can cut things apart and glue them together again. (Although I am proud to say that I helped him make a Christmas wreath for our door yesterday!)

Wow, that was dry, wasn't it? Suffice it to say that Michael seems to be enjoying this year of homeschooling. He has told me that he wants to continue it next year when we are back in Florida. Will we? I do not know. Since we are missing the school choice lottery, his chances of getting into the school I would like (because it has a full time gifted program and yes, I think he is gifted) are probably not great. It is also possible that this year of first grade may put him ahead of his peers and I'm shooting myself in the foot here anyway. I have to say that I like homeschooling a lot more than I thought I would. I love the idea and the possibilities, but I am not sure I love the idea of doing it for the duration. Michael is a very easy student. So is Caroline, but I have to go educate. More on this later.